A Reevaluation of People I've Met in DC via The Hunger Games

As I am just days away from returning to The Capital, it's no surprise to anyone that I was crowned victor of the first semester of The Hunger Games: DC. In true, Katniss fashion, I did not win alone--partially because I kind of like some of the people I was around, partially because I have a distaste for blood. Yes, there were some casualties along the way, but sometimes, that's what you need to do in the face of good spirit of the game. Let's take a moment to reevaluate some of the past tributes that will not be returning for the second reaping.
If you recall some of the highlighted tributes from the first installment of The People I've Met in DC via The Hunger Games, you will remember spirited characters such as "Fish Sandwich, Fish Sandwich Boy" and "The Girl I Called Fugly Slut After Too Many Tequila Shots," both lost to the stress and turmoil of the last DC Hunger Games. I imagine that the McDonalds threw to boy out of the restaurant for loitering too long, and our chain smoking friend met her own demise as the result of her own secondhand smoke. But the games must go on, so I will evaluate the new and returning tributes based on their abilities and potential to win, based on the same scale of 1-12. May the odds be ever in our favor.

My OKCupid Match That Called Me Stupid on the Second Date
Haymitch said it best when he discussed "the careers;" sometimes it is more dangerous to be arrogant than it is to be humble. If you've never been on the OKCupid before, it's a quaint dating website that shallowly matches you with people based on questions about political beliefs, cleanliness, and the level of your sexual prowess. Eventually, you talk to someone long enough that you decide that you can't stand to be around them for more than thirty minutes, and you go on a date. Our first date was in a bar, so naturally, the majority I had to go off of was appearance. I tried to live tweet the date, but with volume being limited, I felt as if I should pay attention. The key words I got from the date were: law school, brothers, New York, country music. With that in mind, I decided on a second date. After a mile long trek around the DC monuments, a brief discussion about my move from the South, and an acute case of face molestation, the night ended with me being called stupid because I had never noticed the carousel on the National Lawn. The audacity did not earn a third date, but it could serve in the arena... at least for a time.
Training score: 6

My Cat, Batman
In a twist to this installment, one animal will be introduced into the game. I adopted him from a seemingly overjoyous family, but after a couple weeks, I have realized why they were so overjoyed: it was because they were getting rid of the cat. Batman will remind you a lot of Foxface from the 74th Hunger Games--he's fast and has a knack for really screwing things up. He's already eluded certain murder in my apartment at least four times and has a knack for hiding for days at a time. If you don't hear the cannon, you really can't assume he's died.
Training score: 11

Roommate Andrew
My personal Peeta sustained a lot of damage in the last Hunger Games, so we can only expect for him to follow the same fate as Peeta in Catching Fire. In the first Hunger Games, there was a lot of collateral damage because of Roommate Andrew, and in round two, his baking skills and agile nature with a soccer ball with serve him less faithfully than his faithful attentiveness to the show Dexter. The competitors in this arena will be much less gentle and much more skilled, but his newly displayed ability to consume a much higher volume of alcohol should benefit him. Like Catching Fire (spoiler alert!), it is assumed that myself and Roommate Andrew will still be a forced to be reckoned with. The first games made him much edgier, but then again, didn't it do that to all of us?
Training score: 8

The VP Who Always Tells Me My Clothes are Fabulous!
Okay, so maybe this is a comparison better drawn to Caesar Flickerman than to an actual tribute, but it's my games, and I do what I want. Yes, I have found him to challenge me fashionably in ways I never expected to be, but he's proven himself to be quite the sharp witted competitor. His evaluation of my daily outfits (the vest put me on the "hot" list, my risque use of Chuck Taylors put me on the "not" list), not only intimidated me, but also pushed me to think in ways I hadn't before. If he applies that kind of analysis to his competitors, he should have no problem taking out at least a couple players. However, if the arena's conditions happen to compromise the pleat in his pants, he could be gone before you can say "cornucopia."
Training score: 4

"Too Hungover To Make The Brunch Date We Had Arranged" Girl
Was still too hungover to make it to the Hunger Games. She was killed immediately by the Capital.
Training score: 1

Skinny, Skinny Nora
"Skinny Skinny Nora" who believes obese children should be informed of their obesity is obviously one of the careers in these games. She once endured the scrutiny of frat boys drawing on her cellulite with markers. Because careers always seem to last at least halfway through the book (or movie, if you're totes lazy), I expect that her beauty will push her forward. However, her inability to relate to many people on the unhealthy end of the BMI chart will surely come to hurt her--hopefully not in the same way that Clove or Glimmer went out. Sadly, she will eventually go to that big apple in the sky, which means she has a fashion internship in New York where no one can ever be skinny enough. Le sigh.
Training score: 5

The Man Who Gave Me a Cigarette in the Bar Bathroom
On a night that involved two Long Island Teas, a bottle of wine, and at least three beers, I wasn't looking my best... consider it that moment when Katniss got burned really bad by the fireballs in the woods. In a semi-inebriated stupor, I queried a man in the bathroom for a cigarette, and he gladly gave me one. He asked if I had any change in return, but alas, I only had my Burt's Bees... which I tried to give him. He politely declined. In a way, he was my Rue. Though we were only together for a short time, I will always remember that kindly black man in the bathroom, and I will forever treasure that Newport that he gave me out of the kindness of his heart. He will inevitably meet the same fate as Rue, and I can only hope I'll see him in that big bar bathroom in the sky.
Training score: 9 (just cause he was really great, you know?)

"Rides of Whales" Kelli
Inevitably, in every second installment there has to be a Finnick. A suave, alluring specimen with the ability to charm the pants off the competition and/or drink from anyone's drink in the bar who has an abandoned straw to offer. Kelli proved her strength as the likable tribute, making friends with any and every tribute she encountered. Her personality is only matched by her brute strength to ingest many McNuggets with the conviction only a previous victor can. A career in a different way than "Skinny, Skinny Nora," Kelli has the proven ability to last for days in the arena, but may find difficulty when it comes to befriending fellow tributes.
Training score: 10